A month ago my plane landed in Brussels Airport at 3.30pm. After 18 hours on a plane back from Japan.
11 months and 1 week that I had been away from home. 1 month and 3 weeks from New Zealand.
I thought I would have been happy to come back. I was feeling sick of all the travelling thing by myself but once on the plane I felt like my plane was going to the wrong airport... I wanted to go back to New Zealand so badly ! I thought it would end in London and that I would feel happy once I'll see the Belgian landscape... Nothing at all.
In the airport nothing happened as I thought it would be... Once home everything fell into pieces. That's when I understood I couldn't stay here anymore. I had to leave as soon as possible. Even if the people I left here one year ago showed me how much they had missed me and how happy they are to have me again, I feel like something has broken inside of me. Even if they are around me I'm not happy anymore...
I started to look for Unis in New Zealand as I felt like I couldn't handle 5 years in Belgium anymore. It was too much. Too hard. Too long... So during 3 weeks I hold on something I believed in. I looked every where, I tried to do everything that could have given me the chance to go back to where I feel happy... But after all that I realised it won't be possible. I can't get any scholarship and the visa I would have applied for wasn't the one giving me what I want: live there for the rest of my life.
Now I have to look for Unis here. And do everything to get my residential visa after uni. And then leave.
I remember when, in New Zealand, I did an article quite similar at that one. I was talking about how I was feeling and what this country has meant and mean for me. A lot happened this year. I've changed a lot even if it doesn't really seem like. I think we will leave our home, our parents, our friends or some of them, one day... We all will. I just feel like my time has come...
This will be the last article of my New Zealand Blog... I just don't feel like adding any other pix.
11 months and 1 week that I had been away from home. 1 month and 3 weeks from New Zealand.
I thought I would have been happy to come back. I was feeling sick of all the travelling thing by myself but once on the plane I felt like my plane was going to the wrong airport... I wanted to go back to New Zealand so badly ! I thought it would end in London and that I would feel happy once I'll see the Belgian landscape... Nothing at all.
In the airport nothing happened as I thought it would be... Once home everything fell into pieces. That's when I understood I couldn't stay here anymore. I had to leave as soon as possible. Even if the people I left here one year ago showed me how much they had missed me and how happy they are to have me again, I feel like something has broken inside of me. Even if they are around me I'm not happy anymore...
I started to look for Unis in New Zealand as I felt like I couldn't handle 5 years in Belgium anymore. It was too much. Too hard. Too long... So during 3 weeks I hold on something I believed in. I looked every where, I tried to do everything that could have given me the chance to go back to where I feel happy... But after all that I realised it won't be possible. I can't get any scholarship and the visa I would have applied for wasn't the one giving me what I want: live there for the rest of my life.
Now I have to look for Unis here. And do everything to get my residential visa after uni. And then leave.
I remember when, in New Zealand, I did an article quite similar at that one. I was talking about how I was feeling and what this country has meant and mean for me. A lot happened this year. I've changed a lot even if it doesn't really seem like. I think we will leave our home, our parents, our friends or some of them, one day... We all will. I just feel like my time has come...
This will be the last article of my New Zealand Blog... I just don't feel like adding any other pix.
